FOMO, FOBO and JOMO – what do they mean?

Soon the worst FOMO time of the year will be over – summer. When one barbecue follows the next, festivals and street parties line up one after the other and the outdoor pools, rivers and lakes are calling, I regularly feel like I have to clone myself in order to take part in everything. For me, however, it’s more about the pure enjoyment of summer activities and less about worrying I’m missing out on something. Strictly speaking, probably not really FOMO, perhaps rather FOBO? But let’s start at the beginning – what exactly are these funny-sounding abbreviations all about?

The dark side of networking: FOMO and FOBO

FOMO stands for «Fear of Missing Out». Science defines FOMO as a concern that others are having rewarding experiences that you’re not having yourself. The underlying phenomenon isn’t new, but the term has only been circulating on socials since the 2010s. After all, the rise of social media has really increased the worry of missing out on great experiences.

If you’re comfy on the sofa, TV and snacks already in position, and you accidentally scroll through your feed again, you’ll quickly fall into the trap. When your circle of friends are out but you’re chilling on the sofa, you may feel socially cut off and like you’re missing out on important moments.

FOBO, Fear of Better Options, on the other hand, can even happen while you’re out and about with friends – it’s the fear of missing out on a better alternative. A feeling also extremely amplified by social media. If you’re constantly flooded with options, you quickly find yourself in decision-making difficulties. In the worst-case scenario, you won’t be able to make a decision because you have too many options and still end up on the sofa.

The Joy of Missing Out: JOMO

Those with JOMO feel the opposite, aka, the joy of missing out on something. Joy of Missing Out describes a positive feeling that arises when you actively choose not to participate in certain activities or events. You have time for yourself, which is relaxing and gives you the chance to concentrate on your own interests. This results in well-being instead of stress, as you free yourself from social pressure and set your own priorities.

What can help against FOMO?

Does worrying about missing out sound familiar? Then these tips can help you get your FOMO under control.

• Practice mindfulness by focusing on the moment instead of constantly comparing yourself.
• Strengthen real connections by cultivating quality relationships in real life.
• Question your own values and priorities in order to recognise what’s really important in life.
• Cultivate gratitude by focusing on the positive aspects of your life.
• Have regular digital detoxes and limit push notifications to manage media more consciously.

What helps against FOBO?

Often feel paralysed by the fear of not making the best decision? Here are some tips that can help you overcome your FOBO:

• Set yourself clear deadlines to avoid endless procrastination.
• Consciously limit your options by only considering a manageable number of alternatives.
• Trust your intuition and listen to your gut feeling instead of endlessly searching for the perfect option. (Spoiler: there isn’t one.)
• Accept that there’s no perfect decision and that every choice can have both pros and cons.
• Practice gratitude for the opportunities you have instead of focusing on potential missed opportunities.
• Develop a «good enough» mentality where you’re satisfied by an option that meets your most important criteria.
• Remember that you can learn and grow from every decision, regardless of the outcome.

I, for one, have realised that my opportunities to lie idly on the sofa are too few and far between for me to be plagued by FOMO in these moments. It’s in these moments I realise I’m blessed with JOMO. Fortunately, I rarely have the urge to check out other people’s lives on social media either. So I wouldn’t even notice who was doing what, where. Nevertheless, I’m very much a candidate for FOBO when I’m lying on the grass sunbathing in summer and start wondering whether a canoe journey or a trip to the countryside would’ve been a better choice. But ruminating is rarely or never a good solution, so I’m determined to simply enjoy the moment for the rest of the summer (and beyond)!