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Donald Trump the toaster and other kitchen celebs
14-11-2024
Translation: Jessica Johnson-Ferguson
I’ll bet you anything one of the following celebrities is sitting on your kitchen counter or hiding in a drawer.
«OMG, that’s actually George Clooney roasting my coffee. And isn’t that Scarlett Johansson carbonating water over there?» I know, this sounds like I’m hallucinating. But let’s be honest. Surely, I’m not the only one with a kitchen full of famous people?
Let’s roll out the carpet for five celebs who hang out at mine:
1. Donald Trump, the toaster
This guy makes himself known very loudly. He also has a tendency to overheat when he’s making controversial statements, just like a toaster spitting out slices of charred toast. Funnily enough, many things he says are as true as thinly sliced bread is nourishing. But the toaster is ahead of Trump in one respect: it features six browning levels. Trump’s complexion, on the other hand, has been glowing in the same orange for years.
2. Kamala Harris, the microwave oven
Reheating, cooking, steaming, grilling – the microwave oven’s a jack-of-all-trades just like former prosecutor and senator and current Vice President Kamala Harris. She’s the mediator between the camps, the subtle «ting» in an often overheated political arena. Nevertheless, some believe she’s more about reheating the leftovers the predecessors left and nowhere near as straightforward and efficient as a toaster in delivering results fast.
3. Vladimir Putin, the samovar
Vladimir Putin is as welcoming towards other heads of state as a samovar is to Russian tea drinkers. He enjoys being the centrepiece and demonstrates unfaltering toughness. Even when he’s in hot water, he never cracks. But his reckless behaviour regularly forces him to polish up his image.
4. Daniel Craig, the sous vide precision cooker
This one’s really obvious. My sous vide appliance is shaped like a gun. Thanks to his trusted weapon, former James Bond star Daniel Craig was as accurate as this precision cooking gadget with its «licence to grill» (after cooking, that is). While both appear untouchable thanks to their hard shell, their inner qualities are all about consistent good taste.
5. Kate Winslet, the KitchenAid
Rose DeWitt Bukater, Hannah Schmitz or Elizabeth «Lee» Miller – Kate Winslet played them all. And that’s what she has in common with the KitchenAid, which can mix, chop, stir, knead and all that jazz. Winslet’s movie characters often try to escape social expectations. Just like the KitchenAid brings modernity to the kitchen and remains popular with all genders.
Which celebrities do your kitchen gadgets look like? Let me know in the comments!
Header image: ChatGPT
Darina Schweizer
Senior Editor
Darina.Schweizer@digitecgalaxus.chI like anything that has four legs or roots. The books I enjoy let me peer into the abyss of the human psyche. Unlike those wretched mountains that are forever blocking the view – especially of the sea. Lighthouses are a great place for getting some fresh air too, you know?